March 24, 2026  • By Dennis Beaver

Imagine your spouse or adult child asks, “I am not trying to bother you, but don’t you think it is time to sit down with someone and develop a financial and estate plan?”

Will your reply be one of the following?

• “Things need to settle down first.”
• “Our situation is complicated, so I need to set aside a real block of time.”
• “The business is our retirement plan.”
• “We’re healthy. We have time.”

When I ran these ever-so-common situations by a friend of this column, author and regular Kiplinger contributor Cosmo DeStefano — I recently chatted with him about his book Wealth Your Way — he laughed, only it wasn’t because any of these excuses are truly humorous.

“Things never fully settle down,” he said. “That ‘real block of time’ will never materialize. The complexity becomes the excuse. Yes, the family business can become your retirement plan, but only if it can be sold, transferred or wound down in an orderly way, which requires an estate plan.

“Finally, the unexpected health crisis does not announce itself months ahead of time with a knock on your door and someone saying, ‘You need a durable power of attorney for health care.'”

Meet Rick and Linda

For over two decades, my clients, “Rick and Linda,” both 55, have built one of the most respected disaster remediation franchises in the Western United States.

Flooded basements, smoke-damaged kitchens, mold-infested walls — whatever havoc life inflicts on a home, the high school sweethearts and their crew, most of whom have been with them for years, show up, work fast and are professional and thorough.

They clean up other people’s disasters for a living, treating their employees like members of the family, a testimony to their character.

Their own disaster, however, has been quietly building in the background. They have a million-dollar business, a sizable estate, several adult children and exactly zero estate planning documents in place.

No wills. No buy-sell agreement. No powers of attorney. No life insurance structure.

I have raised these issues with them, and their answer is always the same: “We know, we know. We just haven’t had the time.”

The high cost of ‘we just haven’t had the time’

DeStefano notes that “the cost of delay for a 55-year-old business owner with significant assets and a large family is not abstract. It is specific, measurable and often irreversible.” He gave some examples:

No wills or trust. If you die without a will, your state more or less writes one for you. It will not reflect your wishes, it will not protect your children with special needs or your business partner, and it will likely earn a hefty fee for your attorney because of probate. The court fees could be very high.

Likewise, without a trust, assets aren’t protected, wishes aren’t followed, and your preferred heirs could be disinherited.

No buy-sell agreement. Without a buy-sell agreement, your spouse may become an involuntary business partner with your employees or co-owners. It happens every day, taking a wrecking ball to businesses and families simultaneously.

No life insurance structure. A million-dollar business can trigger significant estate tax exposure. Without proper planning, your heirs could be forced to fire-sell the business to pay the IRS. Often, these kinds of under-pressure sales happen at a fraction of the business’ value and at the worst possible time.

No health care proxy or power of attorney. A sudden illness or accident creates more than a medical crisis. Without these documents, a legal and financial crisis can follow, often requiring court intervention at enormous expense and emotional cost.

The remedy is easier than you think

“The initial meeting with an estate attorney and a financial planner,” DeStefano assures, “is typically two to three hours. That is it. You talk, you share some basic financial information, and the professionals take it from there. They do the heavy lifting.

“You do not need a ‘real block of time.’ You just need an appointment — and to be absolutely candid and open about all of your finances.”

So, how do you find a good financial planner and estate attorney? One way is to ask your CPA or other professionals you already know for a referral.

My approach, with my clients in the office, is to pick up the phone and call people I know, from experience, do a competent job, have compassion and good listening skills and make an appointment right then.

If they protest and say, “Dennis, please, I can call when I am ready,” my reply is, “Yes, I know you can, but you won’t. Now, you have the appointment. Please keep it. Your family and your employees will thank you.

“If you must reschedule, that’s OK. Just don’t waste my colleagues’ time by not showing up and not calling to cancel or reschedule.”

The takeaway

It is easy to see why DeStefano’s Wealth Your Way has become a bestseller. He cares, and he wrapped up our discussion with some down-to-earth commonsense advice:

“Dennis, no one is ever too busy to prevent a disaster. They are just not yet motivated enough to act before one arrives. Rick and Linda have spent 20 years making sure everyone else’s disaster gets cleaned up. Maybe it’s time for them to spend a few hours making sure their own never happens.”

Dennis Beaver Practices law in Bakersfield and welcomes comments and questions from readers,
which may be faxed to (661) 323-7993,
or e-mailed to Lagombeaver1 – at – Gmail.com.

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Shortly after her mother’s death, daughter learns that 25 years earlier mom hid from her a priceless, potentially life-altering educational opportunity. Can anything be done now – could a claim be made against mom’s estate — or is it too late to go back in time?

We’ll tell you the answer in a moment, but, first, let’s travel back to 1992 and meet Celeste, a bright high school student who has a highly competent, dedicated French teacher and her name is Vicki.

Speaking perfect French with a flawless accent, Vicki brings this language to life, becoming characters from history, showing up one day dressed as Napoleon, the next as Marie Antoinette, taking her students to a French restaurant and inspiring them to compete in a local educational foundation’s summer scholarship – one month studying in Lyon, France, all expenses paid.

As you guessed, Celeste entered the competition and won! Having the uncanny ability to mimic Vicki’s native accent, upon her return from France and meeting the foundation’s judges at a reception, all were blown away by this California kid who sounded like she just got off the boat from France.

“I can’t stand the thought of her moving away.”

The president of the foundation sent a letter, addressed to mother and daughter, which stated, “Celeste is gifted, and by accomplishing a major or minor in French, her incredible ability could lead to a job with the State Department, or in the business world, education, anywhere fluency in French is needed. We will pay for all language related expenses at any university she chooses to attend.

“We feel it our duty to do everything possible so that she can put this amazing ability to great use.”

And her mom, how did she react to this offer which could have changed the course of Celeste’s life in so many positive ways? How should any parent who wants a good education for their child reply?

“Oh, no! I can’t stand the thought of her moving away. She likes working with hair and I am going to pay for her to attend cosmetology school,” her mother wrote back, with these words in bold italics, “Leave Us Alone!”

“Mom never told me! I found it all by going through her diary.”

If you wonder whatever became of Celeste, well, mom got her wish. She became a hair stylist, never left her hometown, got married at a young age, and has three teenage daughters who she gave French names.

But Celeste never lost her interest in the language, studying on her own, even subscribing to French magazines. She reads this column online and dropped by the office a few days ago.

“Mom never told me about the offer to pay for my French studies, which was dated Aug. 1, my birthday, when I turned 18. I discovered all of this while reading her journal after she died two weeks ago. Mom wrote, ‘Must hide this from Celeste. I know it is not right, but she would move away and leave me alone. Must do everything to keep her in town.’

“Mr. Beaver. I loved my mother. She just couldn’t cope with the thought of being alone. Her will left almost all of her estate – $500,000 — to an animal shelter and grandchildren. Am I out of place in asking that some of that money be used so that I can take that trip to France she kept from me?

“Perhaps I still would have cut hair, but was cheated out of a chance to have a far different life.”

File a Claim against mom’s estate

We ran Celeste’s story by Bakersfield attorney Kurt Van Sciver. His practice focuses on trusts and estates litigation, so if anyone can provide her direction, he can.

“What a sad story, Dennis, I mean, just think of all the possibilities which she was denied.
This is a compelling case and here is my recommendation:

1. As probate allows creditors to be paid before assets of the decedent are distributed to beneficiaries, it is critical that Celeste file a Creditor’s Claim in the estate.

2. Celeste’s legal position would be that her mother violated a duty towards her by wrongfully withholding the offer.
3. Once filed, the personal representative of the estate will then have an opportunity to review the basis of the claim and decide whether it should be granted or denied.

4. If the claim is denied, Celeste will then need to bring a separate lawsuit against the estate.”
We gave that information to her with two additional recommendations: First, she must follow through on this as an example to her daughters of standing up to unfairness.

Second, to send us real postcards from France.

Dennis Beaver practices law in Bakersfield and enjoys hearing from his readers. Contact Dennis Beaver.

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“My father died recently with no will or trust, and we are just going crazy trying to locate deeds to property, insurance policies, bank accounts and so on. We urged him to address these issues when he was first diagnosed with aggressive prostate cancer, however, being very old-fashioned Chinese, talking of death is taboo.

“We miss him so badly, but we are angry at him and yet feel guilty because we feel this way. You could do a public service by writing about the need to plan so that your loved-ones are not left in such a horrible situation. Thank you, Helen Chang.”

We ran Helen’s question by Boca Raton-based Elder Law attorney Howard Krooks, past president of the National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys, who practices in New York and Florida.

“Dennis, your reader beautifully stated the way so many families in this situation feel. Generally speaking, it is true that people do not like to talk about illness, loss of independence and death. When it comes to doing the things which will reduce the headaches for family members, people fall into one of five categories:

1. A failure to do anything. Some people think about, are urged by spouse and children to do something but still fail to plan or take action.

2. Some people don’t even think about planning. They’re living their lives and it just doesn’t occur to them to plan for what will happen when they are no longer here.

3. A third group, is aware of the need to do something, but are not sure what. Surprisingly, they do not consult with an estate planning attorney to talk about goals or objectives and to find out what it would take to implement their plan.

4. Some people go so far as to meet with a lawyer, find out what they can do and yet still choose not to go forward. This is frustrating to their family, and the lawyer who can see where things will wind up.

“Finally,” Krooks has praise for, “The doers, the people who find out what they can do and set their plan into action. The benefit of a well thought out estate plan — making life for heirs easier and more seamless when the individual is no longer here — is the greatest gift of all to their loved ones.”

You can just picture Helen’s family trying to make sense of dad’s financial life, searching for bank statements, deeds, safe deposit keys, all the result of his failure to organize and have the family’s financial records accessible. A loving memory has been tarnished.

Failure to organize financial affairs creates obstacles for the next of kin

I don’t think that a week goes by without a reader emailing, “My husband took care of everything. I don’t know what we own or what bills to pay. What should I do now?”

That happens, Krooks observes, “When there is a failure to organize your financial affairs. In one accessible place you need:
A list of all assets, including insurance, real estate, Social Security, IRA, bank and financial institutions. Where were the accounts opened? What branch? If you own shares of stock, where are they physically located, where are they held?”

By not taking the time to do this, Krooks warns, “This creates obstacles for the next of kin. If you become incapacitated or die, it becomes extraordinarily difficult to put the pieces of a person’s financial life back together. And don’t forget digital assets, such as user names and passwords,” he underscores.

“The ability to access account information must be available. Today, many financial accounts are paperless, and without a password, significant assets could be overlooked. You also will need to shut down social media. So, all of this is part of document and financial affairs organizing making it easier for your next of kin.”

What is the greatest threat to an aging population who has acquired some assets?

Krooks cites, “Fraud and financial elder abuse as the greatest threat to our aging population. And it can come from anyone, but often there are three story lines. In the first, an adult child falls upon hard times, moves in with mom or dad, begins managing and spending down their finances, leaving nothing.

“In the second, the kids are out of state and a care giver is hired, quickly becoming the new best friend. This becomes a relationship where the care giver isn’t just paid for their services, but given even more money, out of the elderly and vulnerable person’s fear of losing them.”

Finally, Krooks describes the, “New boy or girlfriend who moves in, taking care of your loved one and then money is leaving the account in large chunks.”

Dennis Beaver practices law in Bakersfield and enjoys hearing from his readers. Contact Dennis Beaver.

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We are constantly told of the importance in having a will and estate plan, and yet, so often, little thought goes into fine-tuning — the careful drafting — of these documents which have the power to literally destroy a family.

Today’s story is a good example of a loving father who wanted to be as fair as possible to his sons, but one critical issue was overlooked at the time his will was prepared.

Robert and David — one year apart — grew up on their family’s 160 – ranch, located close to California’s incredibly beautiful State Route 198 near the Central Coast. Their father, who had only a ninth-grade education but good business and common sense, provided well for his family and sent both sons to college. One became a community college teacher, the other an accountant. The brothers are now in their early 60s.

“There have always been two very large, older, country homes on the ranch: the one we all grew up in and the other where the foreman and his family lived,” Robert explained. “About 30 years ago, Dad asked my brother Dave to move back home with his family, to live in the foreman’s house and help him and mom manage business operations. He told Dave — verbally, nothing in writing — that if he stayed there, maintained the property, paid $500 in monthly rent and helped care for him and mom as they got older, the house and the fenced acre on which it sits would be his after 20 years, just like a mortgage,” Robert explained.

“He, his wife and their two kids moved from the nearby city to the country, and for all these years whenever I visited them with my wife and our two sons, it was as if time went backwards. These were some of the happiest moments in all of our lives. It was as if he and I were kids again, growing up on the ranch.

“Dave was true to his word, keeping both homes in excellent condition. He made repairs — some costly — always making those $500 a month in rental payments to Dad. He and his wife took wonderful care of mom and dad. Our parents lived into their 90s.”

For a moment I wondered why Robert was in my office. Then he handed me his parent’s trust and will documents, which were drafted 15 years before their father passed away. The relevant paragraph stated: “Upon the death of the last of us to survive, we direct the family ranch to be equally divided between our two sons.”

At first glance, that seemed fair. But then, a second look revealed what was left out of the will.

What about the house that Dave and his family have lived in for all these years? If it’s Dave’s, then how do you handle the 50-50 gift the will provides? If the brothers agree to simply sell the ranch, will there be an equal division of sale proceeds, or will one get more than the other?

“In the minds of Dave and his wife, they had a contract with Dad. Dave hasn’t said much, but his wife has started to complain that an equal division, according to the will, is unfair and that they are entitled to more than half,” Robert explained.

“She feels they are entitled to be paid the value of the house in addition to their half of the property, which would mean they would probably get $200,000 more than I would. Of course, the will does not address any of these issues. What do you suggest we do?”

Money can destroy families, especially at times like these. Poorly drafted wills or trust documents become an engraved invitation to a lawsuit. So many people lose sight of what matters. Family matters. Love matters. Money is important, but is a relatively small amount more in your pocket worth the loss of close family members?

“When all is said and done, you are going to put well over a million dollars in your bank account. Is that going to make you happier than you are now or change your lifestyle in any real way?” I asked.

“I’ll buy a new car, but aside from that, no, it will just make our retirement easier. It isn’t enough money to change our lives,” he replied.

“Now, let’s say that you insist on the 50-50 division as the will states. What would your father say today, if these facts were presented to him? Would he tell your brother to forget it, or give him credit for all that he’s done these many years? Finally, if a million dollars will not make you happier, would an extra $200,000 have any effect at all?” I asked.

Before answering, I explained that, legally, while most agreements dealing with real property have to be in writing, there are exceptions to the rule. One of which, as here, is when you have an oral agreement and one of the parties has performed his part of the agreement. Under these circumstance, a court would likely honor the agreement.

I added that they both needed to work together, since they were now joint owners of a valuable property.

My reader took a moment to think it over. Before he answered, it was clear he was keeping something from me, judging by his body language.

“Someone close to you has an agenda and wants you to insist on that 50-50 division, am I right?” He nodded.
“It is your wife,” I said. Robert nodded again. “You feel torn between wanting to do what your wife wants, and what you deep down know is fair.”

He vigorously shook his head in agreement. “It really is their house. I knew this all along and figured after reading your column for 10 years, that’s what I would hear from you. If my wife yells at me, I’ll just blame it on you,” he said with a laugh.

Dennis Beaver practices law in Bakersfield and enjoys hearing from his readers. Contact Dennis Beaver.

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“Do I really need a will, or is there some other way of leaving money and property to family or friends?” Jenny asked You and the Law, describing herself as follows:

“I am 32, single, no children. Both of my parents are living. My sister and her family live in San Diego. My car is paid for, I rent an apartment, have a retirement account through work and an IRA. I do not have life insurance. I have a checking and savings account. Currently I do not have anything special to leave to anyone, but would want to be sure my family members can use my assets to pay any of my debts as well as funeral expenses. If there is anything left over, I would like those funds to go towards the education of my nieces and nephews. My net worth, with everything added together, is well under $50,000.”

Not true that everyone needs a will

It is not true that everybody needs a will, and in fact, for lots of people, that’s the last type of legal document they need.

A “do-it-yourself will kit” can be a valuable tool in the hands of someone who knows what they are doing. But if you ask any lawyer who specializes in estate planning to describe the legal nightmares they’ve seen resulting from the frequent improper use of these materials, be prepared to spend an afternoon listening.

Recently, I was invited to meet readers at the Hanford Sentinel’s booth during the Main Street Hanford event, held Thursdays in the summer months. Lots of people dropped by to say Hi or to ask legal questions, many of which concerned wills, family trusts and estate planning in general.

What I found scary were readers who desperately needed a consultation with an attorney, but who either had or were about to buy a will and other documents from some online source. Most did not understand what they were getting into, how much hassle – and expense -they could create for their family by using the forms incorrectly. It became clear during our conversations that very few actually needed a will.

Simple ways for Jenny to transfer property with no will and no probate

“At this stage in her life – looking at the net value of what she has, where it is and how easy it is transfer after her death – Jenny probably does not need a will,” Bakersfield estate planning attorney Melvin Thompson told us. “When the net value of your property is in the $100,000 area or more, then a living trust would be appropriate, but not at this time for Jenny,” he points out.

“Checking and savings accounts, IRAs and retirement benefits allow you to name a beneficiary – that’s the person or people who will receive those funds upon your death without having anything to do with probate or the courts. It is extremely important for Jenny to review all of those accounts and employment-related benefits to be sure that she has named the right family members.

“As long as beneficiary designations have been properly filled out, when the owner passes away, the funds will go to them directly when a copy of the death certificate is provided. These types of accounts are also known as Payable on Death or Totten trusts. What is unique about them is that the beneficiaries have no ownership rights until the person who set up the account passes away. With life insurance policies, it’s the same thing.

“The only issue with Jenny’s wishes concerns her nieces and nephews. While some banks and financial institutions will accept language which reads ‘Payable on My Death to my sister, in trust for her children’s education,’ others would require a trust to be set up.

“The easiest way to provide for her nieces and nephews would be to set up a bank account under the Uniform Gift to Minors Act and make regular deposits. That avoids any will or trust issues,” he suggests.

“Remember that you can generally change beneficiaries at any time. So, if you realize a beneficiary has become unable to manage money, or for whatever reason you want the funds to go to someone else, don’t just think about it. Either go in or contact the financial institution and tell them what you want to do,” he stressed.

“This is Jenny’s money, and she has the right to close savings or investment accounts at any time. That’s one of the benefits of these types of accounts – it’s the owner’s money.”

If not a will, what does Jenny need?

“While your reader does not need a will, there are other, extremely important documents she really should have,” he added.

We’ll look at each of them in our next story.

Dennis Beaver practices law in Bakersfield and enjoys hearing from his readers. Contact Dennis Beaver.

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